Are you a tool?

After yesterday's blog equivalent of jumping into the deep end of the pool, I thought some lighter fare might be in order for today's post.

The current issue of Details magazine has a piece called "63 Signs You May Be A Pretentious Tool."

Basically it's a quiz of 63 statements with yes or no responses. The more "no's" you have, the less of a tool you are.  

It's clearly written for a straight audience (despite Details clearly acknowledging that it has a gay readership too).  Because many a gay man would answer in the affirmative to some of these questions, having the effect of raising one's "fabulous" quotient.

So I took the quiz online.  Of the 63, here are the statements to which I answered yes.

• You think about the lighting at restaurants (But of course. Life is all about lighting.)
• You own eye cream, and you use it. (Well, yeah.)
• You host brunch. (Doesn't everyone?)
• You take off work the day before you host brunch. (Sure, if it's a large enough crowd.)
• You can name an architect who isn't one of the Franks. (Find me a straight guy who's met Zaha.)
• You tell your trainer you want to strengthen your core. (I don't have a trainer but I used to take Pilates, which is all about strengthening your core. So if I had a trainer...)
• You've referred to an event as a gala. (I am a fundraiser, after all.)
• You've recommended your tailor to a friend (Cary goes to her now.)
• You know this great little tapas place. (Ask me about great croquetas in Miami.)
• You use periods instead of dashes in phone numbers. (They look much better.)
• You have a thing for typefaces. (For years and years.)
• You double-kiss. (I spend most of my time in Miami. It's mandatory.)
• Your business venture has a social-networking component. (Any business today that doesn't is out of business very soon.)
• You'd go to Miami only for Basel. (Sure, if I didn't live here I would travel for Basel. Do straight guys even know what Basel is?)
• You photograph your food. (Not all the time, but I've taken pictures of my amazing dark chocolate chip cupcakes and posted them on Facebook.)
• You think you're down with lesbian chefs. (Ever had dessert at Michael's Genuine in the Miami Design District. If so, you know what I mean.)
• You've crossed state lines for a flea market. (Not yet, but I would if it was really, really good.)

Of the 63, I responded to 17 in the affirmative. That makes me, on the pretentious a-hole spectrum (according to Details), a "pseudo-tool."  Here's how the website describes it:

You might not lose sleep (on your 600-threat-count sheets) thinking about your upcoming shopping trip to Japan, but having a favorite artisanal butcher or fixating on the fit of your polo shirts is not normal. Just try not to judge people by the book they're reading or the beer they're drinking, okay?

Only 600-thread-count??

Comments

[S.]

Sadly (or not), I know someone who ticked off many of those boxes.

No, it wasn't me.

[Udisgustme13]

I'm very curious about this quiz.
where can I find all 63 statements?